Scammers

12:11 PM

School's out for the summer! I've got a million profound things I want to figure out on this web space....but before you're inundated with seriousness, here's another snapshot in my crazy life.

This morning, I set up my laptop in the library to write out a semester's worth of blog posts. My phone rang. A private number.

"How sketch," I thought, answering the phone. Background mumbling answered me back.

"Hello! How are you today, mum?"

Is that a Jamaican + Middle-Eastern accent?

"I'm good, how are you?"

"I am good, mum! And I am calling to let you know, that you have won $950,000 and a car!"

"Wow."

Is it morally justifiable to hang up at this moment?

"Yes! [more background mumbling to determine how to handle my underwhelment] Hello? Hello?"

"Hi, I'm here. I can't understand you."

[Jamaican/Middle Eastern mumbling]

"Am I what?"

"Where are you, are you at work?"

I'm getting hunted and murdered too. Sweet. It's morally justifiable to lie and hang up right now, yes?

I hesitated. "I'm not at a work," I said, because I just finished a year of school and have all the time in the world. Time. Time. That's it! "But I actually don't have time to talk right now."

[Jamaican/Middle Eastern mumbling] Beeep. 

Phew. My friend the scammer solved my moral conundrum for me.

Do you have any crazy phone call stories? Are you done with school?

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6 impressions

  1. I got an email from the Federal Republic of Nigeria yesterday. It started like this: "Based on our investigation department, we wish to warn you against some Miscreants, Hoodlums and touts who go about scamming innocent people by claiming to be who they are not and thereby tarnishing the image of this wonderful country."

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    Replies
    1. That's actually quite beautiful. Touts indeed!

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  2. I get emails in Italian telling me I should tour Tuscany by bicycle. They're actually kind of fun.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, well. Maybe this is a sign. ;) :D

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    2. Yeah, until they tell me they need my social security number and banking information... then it's a sign of something else entirely.

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    3. O.o Well, that's totally not sketchy at all.....

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